“Very occasionally, if you pay really close attention, life doesn’t suck.”
― Joss Whedon
During my time with The Coaching Fellowship, one of the many lessons my coach taught me was, “What you focus your attention on determines what you miss.” Shout out to my coach, the fantastic Janice Reches!
I don’t know about you, but I constantly have to re-orient my focus of attention to have a more broad, truer version of reality in my sights. Just today, I had to remind myself to look for abundance instead of mentally pinpointing all the areas my Type Five ego said were barren and scarce. Shifting my focus immediately changed my perspective and mood! And you know what? There was a white bowl filled to the brim with juicy oranges in front of me. Abundance right under my nose!
Where do you need to re-focus today? Here are some tips by type to help you get started!
Type 1: Ones, you focus your attention on what needs to be improved or fixed in any given situation or relational space. This is exhausting. To avoid burnout, can you try to notice moments where you feel satisfied or light? The experience of both these things will retrain your brain to see the full spectrum of life.
Type 2: Twos, you often leave an event, meeting, group, or hang-out with the question of, “Was I wanted?” Instead, try re-focusing on curiosity about, “Did I enjoy those people? What made me light up during that time? Do I want to continue to be a part of this scene?”
Type 3: Threes, you are often preoccupied with how well you are doing in any given circumstance, how people see you. Instead, try to re-focusing on being present, noticing how your body feels when someone says something or any emotions that well up within. Can you notice your existence?
Type 4: Fours, you tend to be hyper-aware of feelings of superiority and inferiority to others. You swing, dizzyingly, between the two. Could you try to re-focus on all the similarities between yourself and others> How do you see yourself belonging to the world?
Type 5: Fives, you get lost down rabbit-holes of attention-time-sucks like Google to stave off the feeling that the world will swallow you whole. Scarcity drives you. Instead, try to re-focus on abundance, noting any little place or things that give you joy. Mantra, “I’m looking for abundance.”
Type 6: Sixes, you often have scanning sort-of attention, warily assessing if others are trustworthy. Instead, try shifting your focus onto yourself. Where have you proven to yourself that you’re trustworthy? Can you see areas of strength and capability?
Type 7: Sevens, you tend to focus on future-oriented ideas, imaging what could be and missing out on what is. Could you practice feeling grounded in the present by wiggling your toes, breathing deeply, noticing the temperature of the room, and listening to the sounds all around you?
Type 8: Eights, you move out into the world, scanning for where you can exert power and control, using up energy better spent on doing things that truly matter to you. Can you try identifying who else might take over so that you can relax and get down to your own business?
Type 9: Nines, many of you find that focus is lacking, getting caught up in whatever person or situation is right in front of you. However, even a lack of attention is attention. Can you find your focus by creating small moments for yourself each day? Ask, “What do I feel, think, or want?”
Is Enneagram Coaching right for you? Set up a free 15-minute consultation today to find out! I have a few spring openings left!