Respecting the 9 Enneagram Types

Respect can be defined as, “A feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.” With healthy respect you and I have the capacity to appreciate the differences within each Enneagram Type, and within each unique soul, even when those differences might feel confusing or polarizing. (Or drive us crazy!)

Respecting each other allows us to treat all human beings with dignity and worth, something our world today needs more than ever. Think about the change that happens when two people who might not normally get along decide to respect each other. A shift happens, an energy moves, and suddenly peace is possible—even within disagreement.

Here is a quick list of tips for respecting the nine Enneagram Types.

Respecting a 1:

Thank them for a job well done, making sure to point out that you’ve noticed how thoroughly they completed every part of the task. Ones work hard for your benefit.

Respecting a 2:

Send them a handwritten thank you card for something they’ve done for you, affirming how much you love them. Acknowledge how much they give.

Respecting a 3:

Appreciate their doing as an act of investing in a relationship, person, organization, or cause. Their work has a direct connection to their hearts and should be treated with care.

Respecting a 4:

Invite them to share their opinions about hard issues. They have a deep well of emotional intelligence that often goes unnoticed in meetings, conflicts, projects, and on teams. They want to use their EQ to help.

Respecting a 5:

Don’t interrupt them. It takes serious effort to coalesce all that thinking into coherent speech. They’re trying hard to share relevant information/wisdom with you.

Respecting a 6:

Allowing space for them to process all the scenarios, because you know they’ll unearth weaknesses in your plan or project that will ultimately help you succeed. Sixes are on your side.

Respecting a 7:

Release the expectation that they’ll always be happy. They have a rich well of wisdom and being to give, but can only do so when space is safe enough for them to share the full spectrum of their selfhood.

Respecting an 8:

Step aside when you see them leading effectively and allow them to be in control. They use their innate power to serve and protect.

Respecting a 9:

BOTH give them time and space to withdraw or go with the flow as they need to keep peace, AND periodically remind them how much their unique presence matters. They love you fiercely.

Hope these tips are helpful! Please feel free to comment below with ways you feel respect as your Type, or ways you’ve learned to respect other Types! – Melissa

*Be sure to check out my new Enneagram Self-Love Downloads you can print and use instantly!*

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