The funny thing about the Enneagram health/aware/integration arrows is that we can’t force the move. It simply happens with a combination of inner work + natural wiring + intention + flow. We never quite figure out the formula. I’m a nerdy Enneagram Type Five, and even I use words like unexplainable and magical to describe the health arrow move!
Integration to your health number (or type) provides you with new energy, new awareness, and expansive options. How do you want to move forward in a different way? What got you here, and how do you feel? What do you see in a new light? What do you sense is right? How must things change? What will enliven and enrich your life?
Use your answers to accept the gifts of your health arrow – they almost always lead to expansion, healing, joy, and a revitalized relationship with yourself!
As you read through these, remember that they are a list of high-side attributes you go to in your health arrow. They are the best of that type. These are all qualities to help you notice when you’re in alignment.
Type 1 – To – Type 7
I find life fun and enjoyable. My mind expands, and I accept new ideas. Pleasure becomes a healthy priority. I embrace spontaneous adventures. My thinking becomes much more gray. I make decisions that resonate and feel good in my mind, body, and heart.
Type 2 – To – Type 4
My inner world is known to me. I take self-important risks and reap the rewards of trying new things. I can say no with confidence. I grant all my emotions equal importance. I learn how to love being with myself. My mind is filled with exciting ideas.
Type 3 – To – Type 6
I know and trust my own voice and authentic opinions. Loyalty takes the place of competition. I bravely communicate and share my heart. I learn to take careful, considered action. I am genuinely emotive, warm, and loving. I work cooperatively with others.
Type 4 – To – Type 1
I know what needs to be done. I find congruence in many areas of my life. I think objectively and with precision. My gut intuition is strong and trustworthy. My emotions and actions become aligned. I create new realities every day.
Type 5 – To – Type 8
My mind finds pockets of quiet. I move into the world with power an ease. I am aware of desire and act on it. My body speaks to me, and I listen to it. I relish life with robust energy. I accomplish goals with great success.
Type 6 – To – Type 9
All is well and will be well. I attract people who support and love me. I trust in the goodness of the universe. My body is on my side. My intuition is strong and leads me well. I relax, let go, and allow life to unfold.
Type 7 – To – Type 5
I focus and get so very much done. I find great delight in the mundane. The moments I inhabit are satisfying. My body is here, singing with life. I accept stillness and all it holds. My mind is my rational ally.
Type 8 – To – Type 2
I see others as worthy equals. My soft heart is shown to a chosen few. I embrace risk as part of being loved. My protection of others is boundaried. I accept my own humanity. My inner child feels safe to play.
Type 9 – To – Type 3
I know I am loved, worthy, and special. My goals become actions that are achieved. I take a stand on vital issues. My wants and needs become known to me. I see myself as someone of importance. My heart guides me, showing me the way.
1. Hard times happen to everyone. They are not your fault and the universe isn’t punishing you. You are loved and wanted. Reach out as much as you need to. Being reminded of how lovable and worthy you are is a key way to get through difficulties.
2. Acknowledge that two things can be true at the same time. You might have no idea what to do and know exactly what to do all in the same breath. This confusion and sometimes bone deep exhaustion is normal. Rest, trust, take the next right step and nothing more.
Type 1
When life is hard, I remember that I can ask for support, encouragement, and reminders that being exactly where I am is okay. I am going through a hard time because I’m human; there is nothing bad or wrong with me. I can delegate tasks to others and reconnect with myself. I am worthy and loved and don’t have to do it all right now.
Type 2
When life is hard, I remember this is precisely when it’s good and right to be “selfish.” I can ask for others to help me put myself first. Hard times happen to helpers, too. I’m worth being here, I’m worth showing up for myself, and I’m worth the space to rest and heal. Now is the time to sleep, have fun, do nothing, read, relax, and just be.
Type 3
When life is hard, I remember that I am a someone who needs to verbally process during hard times. I can ask someone to let me vent. I’m allowed to seek external validation; I need to hear I’m doing a good job right now. I can assess what to do and what to let go of to slow down. I am a person, and I have limits. I deserve love.
Type 4
When life is hard, I remember who I am and what I feel is never “not enough” or “too much.” This is precisely the right time to ask for validation, hugs, encouragement, and help from others. In my gut, I know how to process this challenging time and give myself permission to do so freely. This is not my fault; it happens to everyone.
Type 5
When life is hard, I remember it’s normal for me to feel immense anxiety during hard times. I’m allowed the space to worry and try to figure out how to fix things. I can ask for help with daily tasks and for a listening ear. I am not alone; there are people who love me. I am not deficient; this is a lot, and letting go is okay.
Type 6
When life is hard, I remember that hard times are when it’s appropriate for me to reach out to my network. I can ask for time to talk and also to seek opinions. There is nothing wrong with being overwhelmed and needing support. I can do this, but I don’t have to do it by myself. I am so freaking strong, and it’s also okay to break down.
Type 7
When life is hard, I remember this is when I’m totally allowed to vacillate between needing other’s upbeat energy and time alone. I can ask people who know my deeper side for advice. It’s okay for me to feel sadness and anxiety in small chunks and not all at once. I am resilient, soft, badass, tired, lonely, and kind of okay all at once.
Type 8
When life is hard, I remember that hard times are when I can seek out safe, professional support. I can ask for time away to think and help getting out of my head. I don’t have to muscle through this. My emotions are valid and true. I am lovable exactly as I am. Resting isn’t a failure. It’s storing energy to fight the good fight another day.
Type 9
When life is hard, I remember this is the perfect time to ask others to check on me. I need love, time to vent, support, and a lot of space. There is nothing I did to cause this. I might see eight million ways out and not know which one to choose. I can trust myself. I am allowed to wait and see what happens and/or also take cautious action.
Our Enneagram type’s job is to protect us, to keep us safe. Type (or internal parts) form patterns of thought, feeling, and behavior that shield us from being hurt, wounded, and in pain. These parts of our type have a lot of power, but no matter how hard they work on our behalf…life inevitably presents triggers and activations.
We DO eventually experience all the things our type (or internal parts) try to avoid. It happens to everyone. We all get activated, wounded, and hurt. Here is where we need deep breaths. Take a few now. In through the nose and out through the mouth. Let your breathing deepen and slow.
As you breathe, allow your awareness to flood with love, seeing your type/ego/parts. Then notice where in the body you feel them. Next ask what they need from you. Often our type/ego/parts need a loving witness, to be seen and known. With intention ask yourself, what new choices might be before me? If type cannot protect me in the same way it’s always done, how can I expand, grow, and heal while facing this activator? What new, healthy ways can I respond?
If you have any trouble locating these internal parts or energies, here is a list of common activators for each Enneagram Type. These are some places and events that require deep breaths! Do any of them resonate with you?
Type 1
• When others dismiss my emotions, not understanding that I’m sensitive and emotionality takes work.
• When life gets messy and I don’t feel like I have control.
• When my concerns aren’t heard; it feels unjust.
• When I or others fail to meet my expectations.
Type 2
• When I’ve worked hard to make others feel seen and known but that energy isn’t reciprocated.
• When my emotions are strong and I feel them deeply.
• When others are suffering and I don’t know how to help.
• When I feel rejected or that people don’t understand me.
Type 3
• When I hit my energetic limit, it’s like everything shuts down, and I’m fully done.
• When I’m brave enough to share, and others don’t listen.
• When my valiant efforts on your behalf are disrespected.
• When I don’t know how I feel and my insides are a confusing tangle that I can’t grasp.
Type 4
• When others don’t get me, despite how hard I’ve worked to communicate my nuance and complexity as a person.
• When I’m ignored or left out; when I’m slighted.
• When life is so raw, I feel it in the marrow of my bones.
• When my emotions overwhelm me, I need to take deep breaths.
Type 5
• When my emotions are safe to emerge, and they do so at once in an overwhelming rush.
• When all the choices feel bad, and there is no logical solution. When I feel trapped.
• When I’m called awkward, and I already feel like I don’t fit in.
• When I’m left out just because I’m quiet and reserved.
Type 6
• When I ask for help and I’m disappointed. When someone doesn’t show up for me.
• When people don’t treat me as worthy and valuable.
• When I feel out of control, and my plans aren’t working.
• When my worries and concerns are invalidated.
Type 7
• When I’m judged or when someone doesn’t talk to me directly about being upset.
• When people fail to live up to the good opinion I have of them.
• When my sadness and pain linger longer than I’d like.
• When my ideas fall flat or don’t pan out like I’d hoped.
Type 8
• When I’m tired because there is a right thing to do, and no one is doing it but me.
• When my emotions bubble to the surface and I feel them.
• When people I counted on seem to betray me.
• When others misunderstand my passion as anger.
Type 9
• When I work so hard to set healthy boundaries and they are not respected.
• When I’ve let tasks pile up and I’m totally overwhelmed.
• When people I love are treated unfairly or cruelly.
• When I’m so understanding of others, but they willfully misunderstand me.
“We have a choice in grief (and life) to encounter resistance with swords, anger, and all the spitfire within us. Or we can recognize a shift in our external lives as a chance to soften and surrender. As much as it pains me to affirm this, we are not in control of the world around us. We are only in control of how we navigate the waves from the helm of our ship.” – Mandy Capehart
It’s the final chapter of this three-part grief and Enneagram series! So far we’ve explored how grief and Enneagram shadow work are very similar in their approach and application. In both instances, we wrestle with the unknown sides of life that indicate unacknowledged pain, confusion, or disruption to our path forward. Effective grief and Enneagram work provides a framework for understanding ourselves and embracing new ways of thinking about our lives and circumstances. The more we learn, the more we realize we are unique individuals. The nuance of our individuality causes our grief journey to be like a fingerprint. Even when some stereotypes apply, there is always a part of our spirit that needs a little more intention.
This journey allows us to cultivate the compassion needed to find movement through our pain. As you embrace the truth of grief in your life, you may find that learning more about your Enneagram type provides extra support.
Today, we’ll unpack Type Seven, Eight, and Nine misconceptions and how they can lead us to incorrect assumptions about how we “should” feel and move through our grief stories. What works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for all. We can reckon with the stereotypical reactions in our enneagram types that act as easy excuses to avoid the deeper, more intimate work of pursuing healing in our grief.
Type Seven
Type Sevens are all about chasing down a vibrant life, but their fear of pain and discomfort becomes front and center in grief. Their avoidant and coping behaviors shift into fifth gear, working overtime to keep the tender-hearted, overthinking Seven safe from emotional turmoil.
Grief and loss can amplify excitability, which feels dismissive and scary to observe. While most Sevens have animated, flighty, disconnected sides, Type Sevens can also be serious, quiet, and introverted.
When Sevens show their depth, people start to ask, “Are you okay?” yet have no idea what to do. Experiencing grief does not mean that a person needs distractions and adventures to heal; they need to be seen as valuable and worthy of love and attention, even when sad and heavyhearted.
The Sevens who know they are safe to fall apart and not demonstrate exuberance all the time will become one of the most loyal, committed, dedicated friends – especially if you’ve walked alongside them through one of the most emotionally trying times in their lives.
Type Eight
Type Eights probably seem least likely to deal well with grief, and that assumption is not too far off. For the average Eight, grief stirs up vulnerability and lack of control in the worst way possible. Eights see grief as just another mountain to overcome and can easily stuff the grief-y feelings to lead and demonstrate command – business as usual comes naturally to the Eight.
But the truth is, Eights need to let go more than any other number. Hidden within vulnerability is a true strength to lead. When Type Eights are grieving, we see their leadership style become more erratic, anxious, and detached. They’ve created another wall to protect themselves from appearing weak or incapable.
On the flip side, when Eights view their grief as an adversary worth challenging, they invite the difficult conversations with patience and grace. After the battle is waged, Eights begin to view grief as a constant truth of life and not an enemy.
These integrated, tender-hearted Eights look softer, kind, and invitational. They’ll start to ask for help because they’ve learned grief will not be strong-armed or intimidated to flee. These challengers know not all battles are meant to be won, but that also doesn’t mean you’ve lost.
Type Nine
Type Nines might seem like the most willing to hear your grief story and unpack the pain with you, but the truth is this number usually needs to retreat into their own pain, not carry yours. Nines are quick to protect their energy. Dealing with the grief of others is an excellent way to use their energy and avoid dealing with their own.
But when Nines decide to honor their boundaries, they suddenly become available to their pain. Independent of the opinion of others, they start to disentangle their mess of emotions and intense avoidance behaviors. Nines feel empowered; their grief is no longer an enemy but a familiar presence that does not make them want to run and hide.
Average Nines need quiet and rest, while integrated Nines are authoritative, calm, and even cheeky in their healing process. They know they can use their stillness and withdrawal as a source of strength and, in doing so, bring that level of stability to others for support. This becomes an energy reserve that doesn’t drain but invigorates. True peace ensues for all when Nines intentionally move toward stressful or grief-y situations instead of falling into them and hiding for days to follow.
Mandy Capehart is an author, speaker, and certified grief and life coach in the Pacific Northwest. She is the founder of The Restorative Grief Project, an online community of grievers and grief supporters looking for movement while they heal. Her first book is titled, “Restorative Grief: Embracing our losses without losing ourselves,” released in 2021. This is a memoir and a 31-day guidebook for managing grief and growth in the aftermath of loss, no matter how long it lasts. You can hear more about her grief work on her podcast, Restorative Grief with Mandy Capehart. She also co-hosts The Uncomfortable Grace Podcast, where space is held for growth amid the messy middle parts of life.
Welcome back to this three-part grief and Enneagram series. To summarize why this series is so important let’s revisit an excerpt from the last post:
“Grief and Enneagram shadow work are very similar in their approach and application. In both instances, we wrestle with the unknown sides of life that indicate unacknowledged pain, confusion, or disruption to our path forward. Effective grief and Enneagram work provides a framework for understanding ourselves and embracing new ways of thinking about our lives and circumstances. The more we learn, the more we realize we are unique individuals. The nuance of our individuality causes our grief journey to be like a fingerprint. Even when some stereotypes apply, there is always a part of our spirit that needs a little more intention.
This journey allows us to cultivate the compassion needed to find movement through our pain. As you embrace the truth of grief in your life, you may find that learning more about your Enneagram type provides extra support.”
Today, I want to unpack three more type misconceptions and how they can lead us to incorrect assumptions about how we “should” feel and move through our grief stories. We already know that what works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for all. We can reckon with the stereotypical reactions in our enneagram types that act as easy excuses to avoid the deeper, more intimate work of pursuing healing in our grief.
Type Four
Type Fours are known for being comfortable with melancholy and conflicting emotions and are often wonderful people for grievers to speak with when their own hearts cannot figure out how to survive a heavy loss.
Fours believe they are fundamentally different, which, in grief, can also lead them to spiral down a road of overthinking. They try to sort their emotions into a grief identity that makes sense yet remains unique.
But what we don’t often see in Type Fours is the propensity for forward motion. Grief is not about learning to move on; it’s about integrating our losses into our identity in a way that allows us to become more nuanced, intentional, and whole. There is no one more adept at adjusting to big, heavy emotions in an integrative way than Fours.
When they live in their heart center, Fours become witty, clever, insightful, and clear-minded. They work through grief productively, thinking intentionally rather than in a circular way. As a result, Fours begin to spiral upward with high energy and healing for themselves and others.
Type Five
Type Fives are full of wisdom, depth, and intelligence. They look for depth with each question, perfectly delighted to chase ideas down whatever obscure path they find. Because Fives are typically introspective and thoughtful, we assume that grief is something they’ve sorted out. Perhaps Fives have learned how to detach from the pain and therefore experience no grief at all?
Not true. What really happens for a grieving Type Five is that their mental wheels spin faster than ever. You may perceive them as cold and calculated, yet Fives are truly empathetic, deeply attuned people. They search for answers to relieve suffering or lack, but that’s not something available in grief. Not truly.
When Fives are able to become embodied – really connecting to the center of who they are – they will find strength outside of knowledge. Type Fives who allow themselves to take action toward reintegration of their whole selves become authoritative, confident, and compassionate to others and themselves.
Once Type Fives accept a thoughtful path toward healing for themselves, they will become the leaders you always suspected they could become. Their emotional side will surface with intention and grounding, leading others to heal, as well.
Type Six
Type Sixes aren’t strangers to thinking about grief – in fact, Sixes are hyper-aware of potential grief events and do all they can to minimize possible loss before it happens. Once introduced to their story, grief drives secure, steady Sixes into overdrive for resolution.
Then, natural cynicism surfaces, affirming their belief that all things are inherently untrustworthy. This draws Type Sixes further away from integration, where they would experience a settled spirit and an understanding of their secure place in the world, even when threatened by grief.
However, when Sixes embrace grief as truth, they gain new insight about the facts of their life circumstances. They acknowledge their lack of control in loss and recognize the grief in their life is not the end of the story. As they begin healing, their lighthearted, confident nature emerges.
Grief changes Sixes for the better, so long as they process their experiences as survivable. Not in a “What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger” platitude way, but through gaining soul-deep, inherent wisdom about the nature of life and loss.
Type Sixes long to express their free-spirited, lighthearted, fun side. When grief doesn’t destroy them, Sixes learn they can find a way to trust others and survive the most intimidating pain because life is so much richer than navigating around fear.
Mandy Capehart is an author, speaker, and certified grief and life coach in the Pacific Northwest. She is the founder of The Restorative Grief Project, an online community of grievers and grief supporters looking for movement while they heal. Her first book is titled, “Restorative Grief: Embracing our losses without losing ourselves,” released in 2021. This is a memoir and 31 day guidebook for managing grief and growth in the aftermath of loss, no matter how long it lasts. You can hear more about her grief work on her podcast, Restorative Grief with Mandy Capehart. She also co-hosts The Uncomfortable Grace Podcast, where space is held for growth amid the messy middle-parts of life.
Grief work is not easy. We assume those who grieve are sad all the time, wallowing in their feelings and crying over every reminder of their loss. Often, grievers feel avoided and ignored because no one wants to accidentally make the griever feel worse. The same is true of the Enneagram – when a friend knows your Enneagram type, you may find they behave differently based on what they expect you to do or say in response.
While this can be frustrating, getting to know ourselves better is the only way to disarm these harmful and dismissive assumptions. Grief and Enneagram shadow work are very similar in their approach and application. In both instances, we wrestle with the unknown sides of life that indicate unacknowledged pain, confusion, or disruption to our path forward.
Effective grief and Enneagram work provides a framework for understanding ourselves and embracing new ways of thinking about our lives and circumstances. The more we learn, the more we realize we are unique individuals. The nuance of our individuality causes our grief journey to be like a fingerprint. Even when some stereotypes apply, there is always a part of our spirit that needs a little more intention.
This journey allows us to cultivate the compassion needed to find movement through our pain. As you embrace the truth of grief in your life, you may find that learning more about your Enneagram type provides extra support.
Today, I want to unpack type misconceptions and how they can lead us to incorrect assumptions about how we “should” feel and move through our grief stories. We already know that what works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for all. We can reckon with the stereotypical reactions in our enneagram types that act as easy excuses to avoid the deeper, more intimate work of pursuing healing in our grief.
Type One
Type Ones are often perceived as hard, black and white, and intense. They’re known for their strict boundaries and their ever-present inner critic keeping them on track (and held back).
In grief, this can look like the person chasing down justice for themselves, trying to find the right way to grieve. But no right way exists, and there is often no real justice for the loss we experience. We have no one to blame, so we tend to blame ourselves. If only we could have found a better path, or made better decisions, maybe we wouldn’t be feeling this much pain.
Yet, Type One’s have access to lightheartedness and a playful demeanor. These integration characteristics will move them through melancholic overthinking and onto a path of restoration. When a Type One embraces the unknown with an expectation of warmth on the other end, they can begin to release their rigid expectations of doing grief “correctly.”
Grievers know two emotions can exist at the same time – because there is gray space in life. When a Type One recognizes ambiguity, their laughter returns, despite sad feelings that remain. And this is the path forward.
Type Two
Type Twos are known for being selfless, casual, and willing to set all their needs aside for the well-being of others. They keep their own emotions close to the vest with an intent to serve — which masks their sense of self.
This can mean they don’t actually grieve! Don’t get me wrong, Twos feel deeply and experience grief personally in their lives. But grief itself and the act of grieving are wildly different, and most of the time, Twos can’t move beyond their default coping mechanism of caring for others.
When Type Twos see the truth that their serving is a safety net, things will shift. They become more introspective and introverted, choosing to move toward their own sense of need and healing in a way that disarms the manic energy to serve others.
This integrated Two becomes a total Zen-master, learning how to engage their inner world with the insight and compassion typically reserved for others. From here, they can teach others how to do the same without needing to do it for them. They release the desire to control or manipulate and instead learn to let themselves and others feel their feelings — even when they’re sad.
Type Three
Type Threes are passionate, externally focused, driven, charismatic, and positive. However, the changing masks of a Three make it harder for their genuine emotions to surface. In seasons of grief, this becomes more evident.
Threes need to know they are safe to fall apart, and that level of trust doesn’t come easily. So many Threes will convince others and themselves they’re doing fine. Barely impacted at all, even. Sure, grief is sad, and, like everyone else, they feel sad about the loss. But for the most part, a Three may seem even-keeled and smooth as glass on the outside.
Internally, however, a war is waging. Type Threes who learn to engage their repressed emotions and feel intentionally can be incredibly supportive and loving to themselves and others. Threes are usually supportive, but learning to authentically and honestly support themselves means they also have to drop the act of having it together all the time.
Emotionally healthy Threes will be honest with their safe few when they are overwhelmed, grieving, and need help. The hard part for grieving Threes is that while they believe their masks are intact, everyone else can see the facade cracking. The pressure of loss is too heavy to bear alone, and a Three can move into a place of cooperation for their own healing when the atmosphere is safe enough.
Part 2 & 3 Coming Soon!
Mandy Capehart is an author, speaker, and certified grief and life coach in the Pacific Northwest. She is the founder of The Restorative Grief Project, an online community of grievers and grief supporters looking for movement while they heal. Her first book is titled, “Restorative Grief: Embracing our losses without losing ourselves,” released in 2021. This is a memoir and 31 day guidebook for managing grief and growth in the aftermath of loss, no matter how long it lasts. You can hear more about her grief work on her podcast, Restorative Grief with Mandy Capehart. She also co-hosts The Uncomfortable Grace Podcast, where space is held for growth amid the messy middle-parts of life.
Good morning Enneagram Paths friends! I hope you are safe and well. I’m sending out love, presence, and light to all of you today.
We have two amazing people, and Type Sixes, in the house! Ruth Nathaniel and Julianne Gibson have graciously allowed me to interview them and ask what it’s like to be a Type Six. Their answers put me in the mind, body, and emotions of a Six and are so helpful. It’s wonderful to hear from all different kinds people about how the Enneagram is impacting their lives. Thank you both for sharing your thoughts and experiences!
Ruth Nathaniel
1. What has it been like being a Type Six during Covid, quarantine, and social distancing? How have you coped?
As a Type Six, this season of life has been tough, but pulled out the greatest shades of courage I could muster. I practiced radical acceptance as we postponed our wedding not once but twice (fingers crossed for 2022!), trekked through the nerve-wracking green card process and its limitations (including not working for a whole year), as well as trusting the scientific community to pull through with a viable vaccine to help curb the pandemic since so many of my loved ones are immunocompromised and abroad. Deep down I knew I had all of the tools to ground myself when I felt anxious, depressed, or lonely. The real challenge was to actually do it! Some of these tools were creating art, staying physically active, scheduling FaceTime calls with my friends in Canada, and giving myself permission to simply rest when I needed to.
2. What is the thing you like the most about being a Six?
Over the last few years, especially since learning more about my type and growing towards health, I’ve wrestled with my silence and lack of boundaries in relationships with authority figures. There was a time when I would’ve completely crumbled at the thought of “disrupting” the flow of these relationships or calling out abusive behavior, even when I was being mistreated. However, I’ve been empowered by my ability to look within for assurance in my decision making and judgement, and not to others. As a Six I have a strong voice and now use it to speak truth to power. Furthermore, when you’ve had traumatic experiences with important figures in your life, it can negatively affect how you view other people too. As a Type Six, I need not resort to pessimism and suspicion, but can actually trust the people around me since I possess an abundance of good faith AND know there is an abundance of good humans to call my friends.
3. Tell us about fear or doubt. How do you engage with fear/doubt and calm it so that you feel internal peace and trust in yourself?
Fear and doubt are familiar voices in my head, as such I’ve focused less on silencing them and more on speaking to them in the moments they show up. My fear and doubts can be justified (through some train of logic) almost all the time but realistically they have the most power when I keep them inside and let them cast larger than life shadows in my mind. I’ve found that naming my fear or doubt aloud strips them of some of their power and ambiguity, and makes space for alternative perspectives to be introduced. I like to remind myself of decisions I’ve made that yielded less than ideal outcomes, and how all of those choices still led me to a life I love and people I adore.
4. How do you use your Stress Arrow to Type Three to help you these days? Are there any tips you’d give other Sixes about choosing some of the high-side traits of Three to be of service to you in stress?
One of the most impactful perspectives about the stress arrow is that it is merely a weak coping mechanism to get us through a difficult time. The inclination to be overly competitive or achievement based is a feature of my personality in stress and does not reflect my personhood or essence. As a child, affirmation was only given in response to achievement. I performed to be loved. It was such a literal conditioning that my parents’ house is full of displays of ribbons and trophies from my youth. As such, it’s easy to be highly irritated by Type Threes when you associate some of their traits with your own trauma and stress, so I’d encourage Type Sixes to do life with a Type Three. This friendship will not only teach you how to be empathetic and open-minded when they are not at their best, but also foster grace for yourself when you exhibit similar features from time to time or lean on your old personality crutches. I have a few healthy Type Threes in my inner circle who illuminate the positive side of those much needed traits, and help me see that self-assuredness and decisive action can be harnessed for good and not to simply position myself when I am insecure or seeking love.
5. Are you a Social, Self-Preservation, or Sexual/One-to-One Subtype? What does this instinct look like in your daily life? How does it drive some of your behaviors, thoughts, and feelings?
I am dominantly a self-preservation subtype, surely gleaning from the other subtypes from time to time. This instinct is most present in my approach to feeling and communicating my anger. As a child, I felt that if someone was angry then their love was conditional, and receiving their love was based on how little I could anger them. As an adult, I had to reckon with that conditioning and examine why safely communicating anger is actually important and can be a loving thing to do. I’ve learned that my anger signals when something hits close to the heart and acknowledging my own defensiveness is helpful to both me and the people I communicate it to. Anger does not make me less lovable, it clarifies my values and can actually increase the stability and safety in relationships when used appropriately. At my best, this looks like communicating when I am upset in a clear, confident manner without bottling things up or lashing out.
6. From the perspective of a Type Six, how can we best support each other during these difficult times?
A deep breath can change everything. When you are feeling overwhelmed by something you’ve read, heard, or witnessed, take a moment to ground yourself in the present. Sometimes all it takes is closing your eyes and taking a few conscious breaths. Other times, when tensions are high, and it’s easiest to lash out (especially behind a computer screen), consider writing down how you feel in a notebook and decide if it’s actually how you want to represent yourself and your perspective online before publishing it. A little grace goes a long way, and while hardship exists everywhere at all times, this past year and a half has perhaps opened our eyes to the sheer vulnerability and insecurity so many people experience. When we are tempted to compare suffering, I would encourage us all to approach our interactions from a place of abundance. Compassion, kindness, and a listening ear cost us very little and go so far.
Ruth Nathaniel is a licensed psychotherapist who sees clients in Chicago and Denver. She is Tamil-Canadian and the daughter of immigrants. You can usually find her laughing at niche memes and tweets, painting, trying a new recipe, or working up a sweat. You can read more about Ruth’s approach to therapy at https://optimumjoy.com/ruth-nathaniel/ and follow her on Twitter at @ruthsnathaniel
1. What has it been like being a Type Six during Covid, quarantine, and social distancing? How have you coped?
It was difficult to be a scientist during this time. I work in the wilderness, and I could not access the wilderness – my research was literally shut down. It was hard having the thing I’ve dedicated my life to taken from me. It was also hard not being able to collaborate with my colleagues in person anymore. It really took the joy out of science for me for quite a while. I coped largely by taking it easier on myself, taking the lesser grade, accepting that my field research would have less data and a shorter time frame. I think I had a harder time being separated from colleagues than I did my friends, but my best friend is a colleague so I’m sure that’s why. I Zoomed with her quite often, and that helped a lot. She and I really supported each other in our scientific expenditures during that period.
In terms of non-scientific matters, I can’t say that I coped. I had family issues, relationship issues, body issues, everything. I think at the time I just kept telling myself to take it day by day and that everything would be okay. I took every problem one problem at a time and tried to communicate as best as I could with my partner. Also, I had weekly virtual therapy with my therapist, and she helped me feel hope.
2. What is the thing you like the most about being a Six?
I like how brave I am. I genuinely believe I am more courageous than most because I must face legitimate fears on a more consistent basis. As a result of this, I appreciate that I know how I will handle fear and doubt when in bad situations. Unfortunately, some awful things have happened and my significant other really did not cope well, he shut down emotionally. I took control in that situation and stepped up to the plate. I like that I know that if I am out conducting research with a group and we get lost in the wilderness, I know that regardless of how scared I am, I will put it aside in the moment. I would say as an extension of this that I like how quickly I can imagine all of the possibilities as it is really a wonderful trait for my career as well as for everyday life.
3. Tell us about fear or doubt. How do you engage with fear/doubt and calm it so that you feel internal peace and trust in yourself?
It’s funny because I was pretty unaware of my issues with fear prior to finding out about my type three years ago. I’d been in weekly therapy for several years prior to that and I’ve had anxiety for as long as I could remember. However, I always viewed myself as a brave person – which I am, but I had not identified that many of the issues I dealt with were fear-based. Now that I recognize that, I have developed some coping skills and generally I focus on mindfulness. Primarily, I find that doing helps the most. I can really convince myself that I am not capable of things when I think, and I can support it with many experiences and feelings. However, often, when I go out and do that thing, I am completely fine. One example of this is scuba diving. I was so terrified the entire lead up to my first time scuba diving, but when I finally did it, I was fine. Additionally, I think that the more that I push myself to simply take the jump and do things, whether it’s an activity or making a choice, I build more trust in myself and create more memories of myself being successful. Sometimes I can’t go right out and do something though – such as with the Europe trip that my best friend and I are planning. I have so many fears – what if we fight and are never friends again? What if I can’t sleep in the hostels considering my bad sleep issues? What if someone steals from us? What if we get hurt? I cope with these fears by acknowledging that they are possible, and doing my best to prepare for them, but that I can’t not do things based upon my fear. I think in truth that is my greatest fear – to not do all of the things I have dreamed of doing my entire life out of fear. One last note I will mention on the topic of fear is that I’ve learned the worst time for fear for me is at night. I think this is the worst time for many people but for me, it is a very fear-based time. As a result, I practice a lot of thought-stopping prior to falling asleep and I generally refuse to allow myself to think about these things, once I notice consciously that I’m thinking about it because it is unproductive.
4. How do you use your Stress Arrow to Type Three to help you these days? Are there any tips you’d give other Sixes about choosing some of the high-side traits of Three to be of service to you in stress?
Ha, so I’m a scientist and I’m not going to lie – I love my three disintegration. I will let myself completely fall apart trying to get an A or set up the perfect research study (or etc.) before I will allow myself to accept being unsuccessful. Also, I’m wonderful at being a chameleon when networking with other scientists and I know how to present myself to them in the way they want. All I can say to other sixes is that if you are going to use your stress arrow, do it for something that is good for you in the grand scheme. I am okay using that stress arrow for my career because my career is the thing that I want the most in life.
5. Are you a Social, Self-Preservation, or Sexual/One-to-One Subtype? What does this instinct look like in your daily life? How does it drive some of your behaviors, thoughts, and feelings?
I am a sexual subtype and I feel that it’s obvious when you learn what a sexual Six. I cope with my fear by trying to be the smartest, strongest, and prettiest in the room. It shows the most when I’m stressed, and it can be extremely toxic. I love weightlifting and athletics, I’ve played sports all my life, but as a woman who grew up in the digital age, I have body issues. I’m also in a healthy relationship so I have some extra love pounds. As a result, I notice that I suddenly become extremely hateful of my body when I am stressed. Similarly, when it comes time to find a new research position or join a new lab, I often become far more stressed about being the smartest than I typically am. Overall, I think my sexual subtype coupled with three disintegration makes for a nasty breed of perfectionism that I spend a lot of time in therapy coping with.
6. From the perspective of a Type Six, how can we best support each other during these difficult times?
For me, it’s listening. I don’t need you to really tell me advice – I’ve already thought of every possibility before I ever came to you. However, sometimes, I don’t have the strength to convince myself that my doubt is just doubt. As a result, having you listen and confirm what I am thinking can be helpful in times where I am too weak to do the self-work to do that for myself. Additionally, I think that more gentle criticisms can be beneficial in hard times.
Julianne Gibson is a scientist who studies wildlife ecology and conservation. I specialize, or rather am trying to specialize, in spatial ecology so I look at ecosystems on a large scale to look for patterns and processes, and I do a lot of coding and mapping to support this work, as well as your general wildlife scientist fieldwork. I am 23 years old so I am still very early into my career, and I would like to get a PhD so that I can be a professor one day. I have been in a long-distance relationship for three years with a nerdy yet extremely adventurous chemist. I am proudly bisexual, though I have not always been so proud in the past. I live in Florida, but I am from Texas. In my free time, I love all the hobbies! Cooking and baking, crafting, games, kayaking, hiking, television, consuming good food and drinks, all the things! I have one dog, a small black lab mutt, who is my world. On the internet, you can find me as @radredecology on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
Hello everyone, and welcome back to Enneagram Paths! Today, we have interviews with Lindsay O’Connor and Becca Briggs who are going to share their experiences as Enneagram Type Sixes.
Let’s take a quick look at the description of a Type Six by Dr. Jerome D. Lubbe, whose book, Whole Identity, outlines a brain-based take on the Enneagram. Click on the book title to check out his entire site and grab a copy of this groundbreaking Enneagram theory for yourself.
Dr. Lubbe uses the term ‘Loyalty’ to summarize Type Sixes. Of Sixes, he says, “The innate human capacity reflected in 6 nature is the energy of loyalty. What 6 nature seeks and is motivated by is guarantees. [Their] primary style of engagement is thought. Positive limbic attachments reinforce a sense of being in concrete and promised. Negative limbic attachments are triggered fastest by unpredictability or insecurity. When overwhelmed, fatigue expresses as anxiety. The primary and practical application for 6 nature is to breathe and practice silence. The healthy 6 nature in each of us is the most gifted at modeling our human capacity for courage.” (Whole Identity, Dr. Jerome D. Lubbe, pg. 59)
Thank you, Lindsay and Becca, for being here today and sharing with us what it means for you to live life as Six!
Lindsay O’Connor
1. What has it been like being a Type Six during Covid, quarantine, and social distancing? How have you coped?
In some ways, I think being a Six has made the pandemic more bearable because I’m used to worrying and planning for the worst-case scenario. Part of me has felt like, at least for the first few months when everything was shut down, the rest of the world was finally catching up to the anxiety, planning, and concern for safety that I always carry. I often feel invalidated in my anxiety, so in an odd way, having the whole world prioritize safety was validating. The more control I felt I had over the situation, the more settled and safe I felt, so when my husband, children, and I were all able to be at home, I felt reasonably safe. However, I am an introvert and have a pretty sizable 5 wing, so one of the greatest challenges during the pandemic has been the lack of alone time. I’ve had difficulty finding space to decompress and feel my own feelings without worrying about how they are impacting family members.
One of my greatest needs is for certainty, which has been very difficult during this odd in-between time when everything keeps changing. Because I cope with anxiety through planning, I’ve struggled with not being able to plan very far in advance as so many things have been subject to change in this phase of the pandemic. I’ve had to learn to hold things loosely and to create my own routines (for myself and for our children) in order to feel some sense of security and control. Structure helps settle my anxiety because it allows me a small degree of predictability when so many things are out of my control.
As a rule-follower who looks to authority figures to offer a sense of guidance and safety, I’ve struggled with the lack of unity and consistent messaging from those in authority (in the government, healthcare, etc.). Deep down, I believe that rules for the common good keep us safe, so it has been frustrating to see everyone disagreeing about the best ways to protect ourselves and others during the pandemic.
2. What is the thing you like the most about being a Six?
My favorite thing about being a Type Six is our concern for and commitment to the common good. I generally want, can envision, and am committed to working toward whatever is most beneficial for everyone, including and especially people whose perspectives have often been ignored, dismissed, or invalidated. I believe in the importance of working toward a group consensus and everyone having agency to be involved in the decisions that affect them.
3. Tell us about fear or doubt. How do you engage with fear/doubt and calm it so that you feel internal peace and trust in yourself?
The first and most basic step for me in engaging and calming fear and doubt has been increased awareness. Enneagram work has taught me to practice non-judgmental self-observation. In the past, I had attached a lot of shame to my anxiety (in general but especially pertaining to postpartum depression and anxiety disorder), so for several years, I’ve been working on becoming more shame-resilient and developing self-compassion. This has helped me to have healthier self-talk. When I recognize fear creeping in, I try to talk myself through it with kindness. When I start second-guessing a decision I made, I remind myself of all the things I did to make the best decision I could. I’m working on really believing that making a decision and then changing my mind doesn’t mean it was a bad decision or that I should not have trusted myself; it simply means that at any given moment, I am making the best decision I can with the information that is available to me.
I use some regular practices and routines to lower my baseline of anxiety as well as tools and mantras that I use in the moment when anxiety is ramped up. Therapy, spiritual direction, Enneagram work, and contemplative practices have helped immensely over time as sort of preventative measures or “maintenance.” Contemplative prayer has been especially beneficial in quieting my mind and getting in touch with my inner knowing, which acts as an anchor I can return to when I get caught up in the stress of daily life. Being outside and moving my body (usually with walks or yoga) helps me integrate my body, mind, and heart. As a head/thinking type, I’m working on reconnecting with my body as a way to get in touch with my real feelings.
I love to write and have found that it allows me to process what I’m thinking. I try to notice when I’m overly concerned with checking in with others for validation instead of trusting my own inner knowing. When I’m feeling especially anxious, I often turn to my body and try to discover what it needs (water, movement, rest, etc.). Viewing my anxiety as something that I carry and can befriend instead of something I need to get rid of has allowed me to see myself as a whole person and not to over-identify with it. When I’m struggling, a mantra that I use is, “You won’t feel this way forever.” Uncomfortable feelings are like waves, and it helps to remember that if I ride them out, they will pass.
4. How do you use your Stress Arrow to Type Three to help you these days? Are there any tips you’d give other Sixes about choosing some of the high-side traits of Three to be of service to you in stress?
The energy I tap into from my stress move to Three is very helpful when I’m feeling paralyzed by fear (on the low/unhealthy side of 6). When the move happens, I often notice that I’m able to set the fear aside and focus on taking the next step, and then the next, in order to keep moving and accomplishing. I get a burst of energy with this move and accomplish a lot. It also increases my confidence, which often shows up when I am teaching or leading a group in some capacity. Those are some of the gifts of the move to Three. However, we (Sixes) need to be aware of when we are too dismissive of others’ feelings in this space, prioritizing tasks over people/relationships, and we need to make time to circle back to our own feelings after we have set them down for a while.
5. Are you a Social, Self-Preservation, or Sexual/One-to-One Subtype? What does this instinct look like in your daily life? How does it drive some of your behaviors, thoughts, and feelings?
I identify the most with the self-preservation subtype. I’ve heard it described as the “warm” subtype (compared to social, which is cool, and sexual, which is hot). For Sixes, this means we are family-oriented, warm, and disarming. All Sixes deal with anxiety and a need for safety, and my subtype means that often the method I use to feel safe is to be warm and disarming towards other people. I think this (subconsciously) is a way that I try to endear myself to others in order to build a strong support system. My disarming behaviors look like avoidance of conflict, being (sometimes overly) accommodating of others, and moving towards others to fulfill their needs.
My subtype also means that most of my anxiety is around health and safety for myself and the people for whom I am responsible. All Sixes are concerned with being responsible and fulfilling duty, and as a self-preserving type, this is focused on practical, daily responsibilities involved in keeping my family and myself healthy and safe. I’m (sometimes overly) focused and intentional with practical physical needs like meal planning, keeping up with doctor appointments, paying bills, etc.
6. From the perspective of a Type Six, how can we best support each other during these difficult times?
I believe that we can love and support others best when we feel healthy, whole, and loved ourselves. As I have worked on developing deeper self-compassion, I’ve noticed that I am more resilient and secure in my identity so I am in a healthier place to be present to the suffering of others. We can support one another by checking in, especially with people who might easily fall through the cracks, and listening and being present to people’s pain without trying to fix it. We can learn to recognize and own the privileges from which we have benefitted and make intentional efforts to listen to and follow the lead of those who have been marginalized in various parts of their identities. As we listen and develop relationships with people who have had different life experiences than we have, we can begin to see concrete ways to stand in solidarity with people who are suffering. For me as a Six, the support I often need and therefore the support I usually give involves listening to and validating people’s experiences without judging them. When we validate each other’s struggles, we can then find common ground where we can connect and work together to make the world a more just and compassionate place.
Lindsay O’Connor has been working with the Enneagram for about five years and is on staff part-time at Life in the Trinity Ministry, which was founded by Enneagram Teacher Suzanne Stabile and Reverend Joseph Stabile. Her favorite job is being mama to her two daughters. She is a writer, reader, former teacher, and most recently, a seminary student. Lindsay is passionate about cultivating spaces and conversations for healing, reconciliation, and flourishing in relationship with God, others, and self. She can usually be found with her nose in a book.
1. What has it been like being a Type Six during Covid, quarantine, and social distancing? How have you coped?
I will admit, the beginning months of Covid were TERRIFYING for me. I couldn’t even go to the grocery store without having a panic attack and felt like I needed to take every precaution necessary. I wouldn’t say it’s been an easy time, but once I quit focusing on the uncertainty and lack of control of everything happening around me, the change of pace and increase in introspection has been extremely beneficial. For years I was in a go-go-go mode, working constantly and extremely stressed on a daily basis. Being able to slow down and figure out what I TRULY want has given me the space and resources to live a simpler, more intuitively guided life instead of reacting to everything around me. I have coped by spending lots of time in nature, learning and starting my own business, and strengthening the relationships with the people closest to me. Having the mental/emotional support of my boyfriend, friends, and mom has honestly made the world of difference in how my quarantine experience played out.
2. What is the thing you like the most about being a Six?
Two things stand out the most. The first, although somewhat stereotypical, is the amount of loyalty given. Although at times it’s maybe caused more harm than good, I do take pride in my level of commitment. It’s hard to find people who truly put their dedication into relationships, jobs, projects, experiences, etc. and I would rather put my full heart and soul in than be half-in and half-out. Secondly, I like being such a deep thinker. As long as I’m not TOO caught up in my head, I actually do enjoy seeing many perspectives, putting puzzle pieces together, finding solutions, and the mental planning and organizing that occurs. I feel like I notice things others don’t, making this a valuable and appreciative skill.
3. Tell us about fear or doubt. How do you engage with fear/doubt and calm it so that you feel internal peace and trust in yourself?
Fear and Doubt feel like the Angel/Devil figures that sit on my shoulders, giving advice and guidance, except both of them can cause a chaotic mental spiral if I’m not careful. This has been a main area of growth for me in my personal development, and I’d be lying if I said they still don’t present themselves to me on a daily basis. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is to find the balance in embracing them for what they are, instead of trying to repress or ignore them, yet not allowing them to control me or my life. Ultimately both fear and doubt are there to protect me, so I honor them as such, but know that just because they’re trying to help doesn’t mean that I NEED their help. They’re merely friends trying to give me suggestions for what to do. I take it into account, but at the end of the day, I make my OWN decision. A life hindered by fear and doubt isn’t a life lived at all, and more often than not pushing past our fears and doubts leads to the most AMAZING experiences that make it all worth it.
4. How do you use your Stress Arrow to Type Three to help you these days? Are there any tips you’d give other Sixes about choosing some of the high-side traits of Three to be of service to you in stress?
This is something I’ve been utilizing recently. I used to ONLY use it as a way to keep myself busy and distract myself from my worries and thoughts. But I’ve found that using it in an intentional and helpful way can actually be extremely beneficial. I either focus on projects that I can easily complete, especially if they’re collaborative or in a way that helps others, or do some strategic planning for myself; personal/professional goal planning, task management, scheduling, etc. – something to get me out of my head and into healthy productive action. The biggest tip I can give to other Six types is to make sure that the actions you take are intentional. Don’t just work to work. Don’t overload yourself just to prove something. Don’t get competitive to test yourself or others. It’s ultimately like a drug, that you never feel better after once you’ve “sobered up”, and trust me I spent YEARS chasing the “high” of overexerting myself. Instead, take healthy actions. Stay “busy” in ways that matter instead of distract. “Compete” with yourself by reaching goals for what you want. You don’t have to prove anything to yourself or anyone else, it feels so much better to stay focused on and true to you and your big-picture vision.
5. Are you a Social, Self-Preservation, or Sexual/One-to-One Subtype? What does this instinct look like in your daily life? How does it drive some of your behaviors, thoughts, and feelings?
My instinct is Self-Preservation, and it shows up in a variety of ways. Firstly, I look to an authority figure in my life. I like knowing I have someone there, helping support and protect me, and letting me know if they see any red flags in any decisions I consider risky. Although I’m currently working on not relying on outside validation as much, it’s nice to have it as a tool to ease my doubts. I’m also someone who prioritizes my physical/mental wellbeing. For example, in the past, I wasn’t able to date or pursue relationships until I had my work/financial/health/living situations figured out, because those took up most (if not all) of my mental capacity. In spending time with friends, if I don’t feel safe/comfortable (physically or emotionally), become too hungry or tired, or get too socially drained (as an introvert) I either won’t go or will leave immediately if I’m already there, and if I’m stressed or overwhelmed, I tend to go off the radar until I feel in a good-enough state to talk to people again. None of this is meant to be rude or uncaring to others, it’s simply a survival thing. Lastly, it’s also given me the unfortunate “worst-case-scenario” thought process. Although I don’t always express it, in my head I’m usually ALWAYS playing out scenarios – especially the worst or craziest ones – down to the last detail. I’m always prepared for the worst, that way if ever it does happen I’ll be prepared to do anything and everything I can to get through it – both for myself and anyone else involved. Because of this though, I have a tendency to be spaced out in my head for a long time if I don’t have something actively taking my attention
6. From the perspective of a Type Six, how can we best support each other during these difficult times?
I believe the best support right now is through community and compassion. There is an amount of personal responsibility that needs to be taken right now, but instead of focusing only on ourselves, I think people should look at the entirety of how their actions will impact others. We are all connected whether or not we want to admit it, and all of our actions have consequences, so being a contribution to the solution and taking any helpful steps will go far. The only way we can get through this without inflicting more chaos and damage is through having empathy and understanding for each other and taking actions to better ourselves and our world instead of focusing on things through a personal funnel of what we WANT to see.
Becca Briggs is a certified life coach and freelance artist, specializing in helping other intuitive creatives reconnect with their passions and purposes through personal development, organizational/strategic planning, and energetic/mindset work. She is dedicated to helping people develop deeper understandings of themselves using tools like the Myers-Briggs, Enneagram, and NLP so they can live their best, most confident, creative, and authentic lives.
Hello Enneagram Paths friends! Today, something fun and totally new for me, typing characters from a TV show. Full disclosure, it took much cajoling by my husband and a podcast by Glennon Doyle and Abby Wambach to convince me to try Ted Lasso. Episode one made me want to to peel all my skin off; it was that uncomfortable. But, by episode two, I was in love with sports and every single character.
Usually, I steer clear of typing fictional characters or public figures because one can only guess and never truly know. Only Jason Sudeikis and the others writers will ever be able to definitely say if a type is correct or not. However, this show is so masterfully crafted I had to give it a go!
Here are my Ted Lasso type guesses so far. I’d expect disagreement, and that’s okay! Please feel free to leave your take in the comments, and let’s have some fun with this 🙂
Roy Kent: 8
Stress move to 5 shows up in taciturn, nihilistic withdrawal that affects his energy. Average 8 would be earlier in his career when he was a force of nature. Health move to 2 shows up as he protects the underdogs, reveals vulnerability, and has a huge heart.
Keeley Jones: 9
Average 9 is her warmth, ability to get along with everyone, and create team unity with true understanding. Stress is 6 anxiety smoking and freaking out about her life choices. Health 3 is when she breaks up with Jamie, owns what she needs with Roy, and crushes her job.
Ted Lasso: 7
Average 7 has him optimistic to the point of weird, yet likable even with his manic energy. He’s endearing. Stress 1 energy shows up when winning matters or his pain threatens to come out of hiding. I think we’ll see healthy 5 emerge through therapy and as he embraces the full spectrum of his emotions.
“Nate” Shelley: 6
Average phobic 6 is being wary, skittish, and prepared for the worst to happen to him. Health 9 shows up when he relaxes into good things showing up in his life. Traumatic parents quickly turn this energy into stress 3 where it’s all about ego and dominating.
Rebecca Welten: 3
Average 3 has her fixated on her looks, public image, and hidden revenge. Stress to 9 shows when she eats her feelings, can’t stand up to mum, and lets her ex walk all over her. Health 6 is embracing team unity, letting others love her, and working for the greater good.
Coach Beard: 5
Average 5 is brilliant, but behind the scenes. Keeps his personality hidden. Offbeat loner who maintains his life in secluded sections. Health 8 is throwing Jamie’s dad out of the locker room like a true leader-protector. Stress 7 is beginning to show with drinking and toxic relationship with Jane.
Dani Rojas: 7
I mean, do I have to explain this one? (wink) He’s happiness on eight million cups of coffee. I think healthy 5 energy shows up in his ability to hone in and focus on a singular thing: soccer. I also think his stress move to 1 shows up in soccer as well; he’s obsessed with it and pursues it to perfection. I’m looking forward to learning more about Dani’s story as season two unfolds.
Jamie Tartt: 3
Average 3 is his whole Jame Tartt persona that hides a wounded son heart seeking approval. Stress 9 energy lets his team down and trade happen without a fight. He gives in to a “whatever happens happens” mentality. Health 6 shows as he realizes he can shine bright AND also help his team win. He becomes loyal and truly magnetic.
Higgins: 2 or 6
I can’t tell yet! He’s loyal yet nervous like a 6, but helpful and longs to be needed like a 2. Both types enjoy getting the recognition they justly deserve, and we see this with Higgins. His motivation is a heart-centered love of his family and I see self-preservation in doing what it takes to keep his job.
I hope you enjoyed these Ted Lasso Enneagram type guesses. Share some of your own! I’m still watching Sam, Dr. Fieldstone, Isaac, and Trent Crimm (maybe he’s a 1?). I adore this show and am so glad for some awesome TV storylines these days!
Happy Tuesday Enneagram Paths friends! Today, I’m bringing you the next installment of my Enneagram Art Series, melding two of my passions: art and the Enneagram.
This Type Five artwork is fifth in a series of nine illustrated paintings that visually imagine the essence and integration experience of each Enneagram Type. Here on the blog, I want to give you both the art and the creation intention behind each piece. Here is a brief, succinct peek into my mind as I painted and inked each piece. The rest of the feeling, resonating, and interpreting is up to you!
Type 5: In this piece, the yellowish-green paint represents both a “cloud” of information and the connection to universal knowing that Fives access in Essence. This cloud aspect is echoed in the lines underneath the eye. The eye is part of the body and harkens to how Fives can observe all with embodied energy in integration. The eyelashes include arrows that point up and down to signify how, in health, Fives can live rich inner and outer lives. The “V” at the top of the illustrated painting shows how the True Self of Fives moves powerfully in and out of the world according to the combined wisdom of their bodies, hearts, and minds. The contract between the defined geometric shapes and the free, messy watercolor paint represents how Fives can simultaneously understand facts and be in tune with mysterious unknowing.
I hope you enjoy! Please feel free to leave me feedback on my @enneagrampaths Twitter and Instagram. All nine illustrated paintings will be shared on social media.
